I know you know my heart even before I pour it out to you. You know every hair on my head. You knit me together. You created my inmost being. So what I’m about to say won’t be a complete shock to you- In fact, you probably knew it before I even knew myself.
Being blessed with a child is the most wonderful gift for a mother. Motherhood is a divine emotion and an incomparable feeling. But God doesn't bless me with a daughter. Yes like many other mothers even I am wishing for a boy. You know the reason behind this.
I myself hate saying this thing. I am saying this knowing that a daughter is one of the most beautiful gift of God, a wonderful miracle. A daughter can only brighten your day and warms your heart whenever you need. Yet I don't want a daughter.
I don’t want a daughter because I’d get a panic attack every time she left the house, imagining all kinds of horrible things happening to her. I would worry all the time till she came home, thinking that something awful would happen to her. I would stop her wearing such clothes if it showed some skin because of the fear that she would be ravaged by wolves lurking at every nook and corner. And every time her phone rang I would wonder if it’s a guy and whether he’s the kind who can take care of her. It would be miserable!! Is that the kind of life that any mother would like to have for her daughter? Obviously No!! Not only me any mother around the world would never wish to have such a miserable life for her daughter.
If I am blessed with a daughter I would definitely try to raise her in such a way that she would have the guts and would face this cruel world without any fear. She would know to differentiate, what is right and what is wrong and would follow her heart. She would be dressed like a lady and wear her best accessories- her smile and confidence. If I had a daughter, I would tell her that she’s here to blaze her own trail and not to live by others’ rules. She ought to measure herself by who she is and celebrate her strengths. Though I’d always like to be in full lioness mode defending her cub, I know that I’d have to let her grow and find her wings, make her mistakes and learn from them, and learn to live with tough stuff at times. But I would like her to know that even though failures, rejections or difficult life events may seem insurmountable at the time they happen, they are just a new beginning and she should open her heart and let these new experiences in.
There are many things that I would do for my daughter but its only me that would do, not the society. Society would try the best possible way to suppress her.
But what if I try the other way round. If I am blessed with a boy I would teach them to treat others’ daughters right! Boys, I know, are growing up in a culture where girls are not only under scrutiny but have also to shoulder the “blame” for the misdemeanour of boys! Of course, we parents need to protect our girls, but we also have to start teaching our boys how to do the same because, no matter what, “boys will be boys” is no excuse. It is never OK to disrespect girls, and it is their job, as gentlemen, to see that doesn’t happen. I would teach them that girls are persons with feelings and are not objects, they should be listened to, their limits must be respected and their reputation must be protected, not married. I am well aware of the fact that I live in a world where the many small courtesies are not extended as graciously to women as they are to men. Let’s not follow the suit. I would inculcate good values in them not for their own sake but for the sake of the precious daughters of our society.
I am ready to take the responsibility of daughter too. For me daughter and son are equal. I hope, I will be able to inculcate the right values in my children. Rest is your decision, God
Your Loving Daughter and a Mother J