And he hugged her. His eyes looking deep into her, his hands onto her ear. “I love you, I wish you could hold me the same way for a lifetime. A caring hand around me all the time. Maybe you won’t love a person like me, but I’ve fallen for you. You changed my outlook on life. The cheeks which almost forgot smiling could not resist crescent curve shading my face. Maybe I am asking for too much but will you hold my hand the same way when my all chips will be down? Will you be mine?”
Image courtesy- weheartit.com
He got dumbfound. He didn’t know how did he say that he just kept looking at her amazingly. Yes, he loved her but he never confessed same because he never found himself as the best guy in her life. She was the girl any guy would die for. He just hugged her and kissed her forehead. And he made a promise to himself that he will overcome all his insecurities, fears for the girl who brought him back to life, who taught him how to live again. While she was resting on his shoulders, he was lost in his thoughts and memory; the memory of how he met her. He went into a flashback.
It was not of those pleasant meetings, where everything is pleasing and soothing to eyes and heart. Not every fairytale has everything fair about them. And it was a start of a chapter of his fairytale.
If he could define himself on the first how she saw her, he will fall shame to his words.
'Have you ever seen a boy, cruel and rude, arrogant and tough, carrying a bulk of hatred towards this world?” This is clearly not one of the best introduction in the world, is it?
A tall, pale, drunk guy with eyes bleeding red that was nowhere near to intoxicating eyes in which you want to be drawn, red eyes as if burning into some flame, lying with those dead looks on the cool sand of a beach, with a bottle of wine in his hand, lost in his negativity. That’s how she met him. She looked at him and she felt pain. It was not compassion when you see a helpless or a part of kindness. That is a thing about people with good heart, they see someone in pain and they feel it as it is painting them.
"What's wrong with you?", she asked in a soft voice.
A sudden voice interrupting his thoughts brought him back to real world. He opened his eyes and looked at her. Her glimpse fascinated him at former, but later his demons got heavy on him again.
"That's none of your business, get lost", he replied curtly.
'Messing with a drunk guy is not one of best ideas' she thought and moved away but she couldn't take her mind off from him. Such was his pain that she forgot that she went to the beach to get herself healed from the pain of getting used to being innocent and always ready to help others helping. Yeah, if you do right things, you will be certainly screwed. This world is indeed a beautiful place to live in. But she could barely remember that. She went back to home thinking about the guy she saw on the beach, the pain his eyes displayed, they grief he had if there is any way she could help him out. Being good is like you yourself is a culprit and victim as well. You see someone is pain and don’t find yourself in peace until they get their life back to peace. Being this great should be considered as a crime itself.
Even before his memory could fade away they collide again. This time he was sane because they don't serve alcohol in Dominos. She was there with her friends and it seems like he never had any friend. She excused herself to her friends and went to him.
"Samara", she said with a warm smile on her face.
"Rohan", he replied in dead expressions.
"You can smile a bit, you know, that make others feel comfortable to talk with."
He wanted to stop himself but he couldn't control and smiled. 'Cute expressions, beautiful face and these lines. Deadly combinations.' He thought.
"Yeah, exactly! That's how a normal human being lives", she grinned when she saw him smiling.
"Would you like to have something?", he asked to hide himself to blush.
"No, thanks! I am here with my friends.", she pointed to her friends.
"What was wrong with you that day?" she asked without wasting a second.
"I was little drunk", he sighed.
“Oh sorry, I am blind. I didn’t see you were drunk.”, she said sarcastically.
"I was just drunk and chilling at the beach", his sarcasm replied back. "But what were you doing there? Do you go there on regular basis?"
"No, I had a fight with my friends so that's why. I believe that vibes of seaside work as a healer."
He was just listening to her. How calm she was. Just beautiful. You can not keep your eyes off from a beautiful face so couldn’t he.
"Friends?" she asked offering her hand.
"Who would miss a chance to be friend with such a beautiful girl", the boy inside him strikes. ‘A lot can happen in a pizza shop, I should visit more often’ the inner Rohan smirked.
You get to know a little or more about someone whom you talk with every day. Rohan and Samara started talking every day since then. They get to know each other a little personally and emotionally. Samara was a little happy, she finally found someone she could share every problem of her, who would listen to her without getting irritated and guide her where needed.
Rohan also felt good in the companion of Samaria. He enjoyed the optimism and liveliness of her. He was fascinated by the way she looked at the world. Whereas Samara was happy to see the flawless smile at the face which used to be depressed. Days were passing they were coming close.
One day, Samara asked Rohan to come along for a road trip to a nearby hill station. He refused at first because he was not someone who loves to be surrounded with many people, but agreed later when she forced him. You can’t deny when a beauty girl force you to come along, can you? Rohan was ready. Rohan, Samara and all her friends were all set for a fine picnic. He was barely interested in having an interaction with any of her friend, so he finds himself in a corner seat with his headphones on. When the whole group was busy in singing aloud in the bus, Samara caught Ro peeping out the window lost in his intense thoughts. Samara asked him to join but as she expected he disagreed. She sat next to him and asked, "Are you okay? Because you don’t look so. I know you’ll say I am fine, but, you know your eyes say otherwise, they sometimes don’t agree with what you say. There is something that is decaying you and I wanted to ask it from day one but never had the courage. I want to listen" looking right into his eyes.
For Rohan, it was a tough question to be replied. Had it been asked to him in examination he would have preferred to skip but it came from a person he started adoring, who gave him a hope, a positivity, who changed his outlook on life. His look got intense and his eyes continued gazing her without a blink.
"Neither every story is interesting to listen, nor every story is easy to tell" he muttered in a low pitch.
Samara held his hand and said "Ro we don’t listen to everything to be entertained, there are some pains that sooth us. You can tell me.” She held his hand tight.
On a sudden, Rohan's phone vibrated. ‘Mom’ the phone screen read. Rohan looked at the phone for awhile and disconnected it. Samara tried to convince him to call his mother back but he denied straight away. Rather he opened his music gallery put his headphones on. Samara didn’t say anything thereafter. She just sat there with him and asked him if he can share his earpiece.
Finally, they reached their destination and ordered food. They had their lunch and as Ro was moving to washbasin he got smashed with Vaibhav (one of group members). The juice Vaibhav had in his hand got spilt onto Rohan.
"Hey watch it! Can't you step carefully? Are you blind or what?" Ro nearly shouted.
"It was you who was moving absent minded. Mind your language. We took you along because of her. So please, be in your limits" Vaibhav replied wrathfully.
"Don't be so smart. I wasn't dying to come along either. What do you think of yourself?" Ro replied in a bad temper, he pushed Vaibhav back.
Vaibhav felt insulted and he slammed Rohan to the wall. Their fight grabbed all the attention and the whole group to calm them down. Samara was scared, she held and asked him to stop and not to create a scene. Ro detached himself and raced away to terrace with a hard look. She followed him. He was sitting on the edge.
"What's wrong?" She asked.
"Everything" his heavy voice was painful. That fight bleed his healed scars. It sprinkled salt on his wounds. She sat next to him and asked him if he is okay.
After sharing a moment of silence, Rohan began, "I was 15 when I got fond of bikes. I used to lend bikes because riding bike is something I am passionate about. Sometimes I would race with my friends on highways. I used to win maximum challenges. It was then I decided that I want to be a racer. I wanted to be a pro racer. But you know what, dreams are easy to be seen, tougher to be accomplished. I asked my dad if asked he can buy me a bike. He refused me first but after a number of efforts, he bought me one. I was so happy, I was on a ninth cloud. I participated in a district level racing and secured the top position. People adored me and motivated me to keep on racing. I reached home with trophy only to listen, ‘you were given a bike for comfort level, not to waste your life wondering shits.’ My father was disappointed, he took the keys and sold the bike. I lost my temper. A boy who had been dreaming of being a racer since years were thrown apart from his interest. I stopped my regular studies and having food. Missed my examinations and wasted my year. My father said he's ashamed to have me, he would rather prefer to be childless than having a child like me. It was then he forced me to join his shop and help him in work. When I avoided going, everyone started avoiding me. My parents lost hope in me. They even stopped replying me at times. All the hope left in their heart was from my little brother. They adored him each day and ignored me every day. I was drowned in frustration. I had no idea what to do, so I went to a wine shop and gulp down the entire wine to calm down my frustration. I joined my friend's father garage later. I've wasted my life and career. I hate my family and my frustration has dissimulated all the goodness within me. I literally have no hope for myself."
Tears rolled down his cheeks. Tightening his wrist, he closed his eyes and mounted his head down. Samara was stunned. She hugged him tightly. She had no idea that he has buried this much pain in his heart.
"It’s not that your parents lost hope in you, they have all their hope from you and you know death racing may cost your life so they might be scared. Prove them you can be a good speed racer. Ask for an opportunity. They're the only non-fake people around you. Trust me, they love you and care for you."
The soft words weren't so soft for Ro. He got up in anger. "I don't need your advice. You know it is easier said to be done, they will never understand me. Anyway, stay out of it....!" He burst into tears and moved away.
Samara got up and grabbed his hand. "I'm sorry, but I can’t see you this way, I want to see you twinkling. It’s not that you can’t, you can. Give yourself a chance." Her sobbing voice uttered slowly.
"And may I ask what's that which is sending you to help someone who already lost all of him, Who is a loser, who has nothing you can adore about?" Ro asked in a heavy blunt voice wondering what made her care for him.
Samara didn’t say anything, she hugged him tight and that made Ro go weak on his knees. Those droplets cannot resist flowing out. And he hugged her, even more, tighter. “I love you, I wish you could hold me the same way for a lifetime. A caring hand around me all the time. Maybe you won’t love a person like me, but I’ve fallen for you. You changed my outlook on life. The cheeks which almost forgot smiling could not resist crescent curve shading my face. Maybe I am asking for too much but will you hold my hand the same way when my all chips will be down? Will you be mine Samara? ", His blunt voice calmed.
Like a lady, she didn’t say yes or no. “Shhhhh.....!” her lips whispered. She held his face and put her lips on his and finally, black and white formed the best shades of grey.